so as you may or may not know, I do not have the .... best relationship with France. It's no one's fault... I'm just not crazy about Paris (overrated), and it has ALWAYS been raining when I've come. Not exactly things to write home about. so I vowed that I would not return to France unless it were warm and I were with someone who speaks French. Well, both things were kiiiinnnddaa true on this trip (cue Molly looking like an idiot as she tries to think about what the phrase would be in French. I kept itching to text Fort for help. I'M JUST KIDDING! she really has been an absolute GODSEND on this trip, especially in Frogland. OOoooh so I'm sitting here in the hallway because that's where the wireless is best, and this man who was American walked by and asked me in really broken French if I had wireless. I really wanted to tell him that I spoke English, but I decided to play along. So much more fun).
ALL RIGHT so we leave the land of overpriced goods behind (ie Switzerland. Seriously! so expensive! my little heart couldn't take it!) and journey over to France... and by journey, I mean we took a bus into France since the train was dead or something equally dramatic. Certainly an interesting thing, since we weren't exactly sure that the bus would get us there or how long it would be. Also, we have had SUCH GOOD LUCK on this trip as in it did not rain at ALL. The only time it really rained was when we were on the bus, or inside, but as SOON as we stepped outside, it wouldn't be raining. Someone is looking out for us, surely. Mother Nature obviously.
SO, we get to Lyon... unfortunately our hostel is at the top of the hill and we had some genuinely scary roommates in a kind of dirty room. As spoiled as it sounds, I really do not want to stay in a hostel again. I am hosteled out. I refuse to travel again until I can afford a hotel room. rich husband, where art thou? am I too k10 for you?
and now, I shall compose a list of people who should NOT stay in hostels.
1) If you know you are a snorer, stop being selfish and DO NOT STAY IN A DORM ROOM IN A HOSTEL. Yes, I know it's cheaper. But I really don't care when my bed is literally vibrating from your snores. I really wanted to shove my fist down your throat (and Jenny probably wanted to cut off your eyelids, her torture device of choice)
2) If you are over 35, it's just weird for you to stay in a hostel. Again, I know it's cheaper. But if I, at 21, can afford to stay in a hotel, so can you. If you can't, you have no business traveling. Stay home and earn money.
The list might not be lengthy, but I assure you, every bit of that has WEIGHT. I have been contemplating this for a while.
so we got into Lyon late in the afternoon and really just walked around, had dinner, lounged, etc. Our standbys. I was a little crankipuss so not too enjoyable. But the next day we got to explore the ROMAN RUINS which we all know gets me as happy as a fraternity boy at a jello-wrestling match (or something not QUITE so graphic). The Roman theater is still used today (amazing! I LOVE THE ROMANS!!! rrr, taking over the globe and crushing everyone in their path... LOVE IT!) and there was a VERY extensive Gallo-Romain museum, which also had my tail wagging. And I do love when things are written in English as well. We did a lot of sitting around and relaxing, as usual, although I am now proud to say that I have played cards in a Roman theater. Jeaaaaallouuus. The rest of the day we mostly ate... I am so serious. We had the good luck to find a ben and jerrys ON FREE CONE DAY. I WAS FAR TOO EXCITED ABOUT THAT. I can't help it if I like to eat. I've had bad influences forcing me to finish all of my food. Although we all know my organs are abnormally small.
The next day, something quite tragic happened. It still hurts to talk about it, but I will try to explain. One of our roommates in the hostel was someone... scary. She was not only over 35, SHE WAS A SNORER and also someone fond of going to bed at 8:30 and demanding lights-out-everyone-quiet as well. And yet she was INCREDIBLY LOUD when she woke up in the morning. I almost threw a hissy fit (I am training at the heels of the master to write nasty-grams). So we are getting ready to roll out Wednesday morning... I open the door, and she is standing there. In my way. Blocking the path. The woman I have sworn to hate for all eternity. I politely try to slip past her, but she GRABS MY SHOULDER and says menacingly, "Ca va?" in a very low, almost growling voice. (now she really just said it normally but we have exaggerated the story so much in the succeeding days that now it's like the devil himself saying it). I weakly smile in response while I shout "I HATE YOU" in my bed (I develop hatred very quickly). However, she is not done yet. She reaches over... AND KISSES MY CHEEK. I accept it, grudgingly. BUT SHE'S NOT DONE. Still holding on to me with her claw, she exposes her cheek and pats it, making it QUITE CLEAR WHAT SHE WANTS (even though I am NOT that kind of girl). I see no recourse but to kiss her back. THE WOMAN I HAD SWORN TO HATE.
Unfortunately for her I had just rinsed my mouth so my chin was REALLY wet. she probably thinks I have an unfortunately condition.
So, we leave Lyon and trundled on to Nice, and I will finish this at a later point in time... I'm still shuddering after my encounter with CA VAAA?!
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